Put a finger down if you stockpile recipes on your social media accounts with every intention of actually trying said recipes; but in reality just end up collecting more and only ever making the same goddamned recipe every single day until you die.
Yep.
That’s me.
And you might be wondering how I got myself into this situation. Well, for starters, this is all Pinterest’s fault. That and my autism which prevents me from straying from foods I choose to fixate on for months until I get right proper SICK of it and choose another food to fixate on. This goes also for cocktails.
For, like, two years my go-to cocktail has been the Last Word (terrible timing on my part, as the fixation began right when the Carthusian Monks decided not to increase production of Green Chartreuse to meet the demand, caused in part by TikTok.)
Fuck you, TikTok.
I digress.
This weekend, I decided to start actually trying the recipes I save on Pinterest, and the most recent recipe was called a “Slippery When Wet”…which looks and tastes nothing like what I imagine it should taste like based on its name. The Slippery When Wet is a creamy strawberry and gin cocktail sweetened with honey. Great concept itself, but I wanted to…elevate it.
Haha.
I hate it when hoity-toity (is that how you actually spell that shit?) mixologists use that fucking word. “It’s an Old Fashioned, but elevated;” “We’re going to just elevate this old classic.” Ugh. Makes me sick. Like how Winifred Sanderson feels about the sun.
But that’s precisely what we’re doing with this Slippery When Wet; and I am re-naming this because Slippery When Wet reminds me of things I’d rather not imbibe. We’re gonna call this the “Barbie Girl,” because it’s pink, fruity and is so fucking good it dismantles a little bit of the patriarchy every time it is enjoyed.
Also, Jellioso made a cool fucking video about this cocktail. Look!
Ingredients
2 oz. Gin
1/2 oz. Italicus
Juice of half a lime
2 medium strawberries
1/2 oz/ honey
1 heaping teaspoon strawberry yogurt
Instructions
1. Grab a pretty glass and fill it with ice.
2. Halve the strawberries and muddle them with the lime juice and honey.
3. Add the gin, Italicus, yogurt and some ice, and shake for 12-15 seconds.
4. Strain into your pretty glass and enjoy while you watch the Barbie movie.
Just Jelli 